Know your enemy

The first step in helping your son or daughter to overcome a drug problem is to educate yourself about the nature of their addiction. To assist you, the following list gives you the essential background information on popular drugs, including their street names and the telltale signs of addiction.

Heroin
Also known as: H or smack

Heroin is by far the most dangerous and addictive drug of all, causing tens of thousands of deaths worldwide every year. Heroin takes the form of a white powder which the user smokes, either from a water-filled vessel (known as a hookah or bong) or from a homemade cigarette (known as a reefer, joint or roach). If your child has started smoking, it is almost certain that he/she is also hooked on heroin.

Despite being dangerous, heroine is also very expensive and a single dose may cost as much as £100 ($70). The high cost of heroin inevitably causes addicts to turn to crime to fund their habit. Stealing and prostitution are two common crimes perpetrated by heroin abusers. If your son frequently stays out at night beyond curfew, it is possible that he is using the cover of darkness to burgle or commit robberies. Alternatively, if you find condoms or contraceptive pills in your daughter's bedroom, she may be working as a prostitute to pay for her next fix of heroin.

Heroin abuse is typically accompanied by listening to "repetitive beat music", which may sometimes be called "ambient", "electronica", "hip-hop", "house", "rave" or "techno".

Crack
Also known as: Jack, Charlie or coke

Crack is a relatively new drug, which is mass-produced in factories in Eastern Europe, South America or Asia. Thanks to the economies of scale made possible by these vast illicit sweatshops, crack is a relatively inexpensive narcotic, costing about £3 ($2) per crack.

Crack comes in the form of a small, brown pellet that both looks and smells like licorice. Pellets of crack are typically chewed, sucked or swallowed whole. Since crack abusers often try to disguise the distinctive smell of the drug on their breath, the use of chewing gum is a warning sign that your child is addicted to crack.

Crack addicts prefer listening to rock music, which may take the form of "death metal", "goth", "heavy metal", "industrial", "punk" or "thrash metal".

Psychedelics

Several different narcotics fall under the umbrella of "psychedelic drugs":

Cannabis AKA: marijuana, hashish, weed, wacky baccy or dope
Ecstasy AKA: MDMA, E, X, meth or crank
LSD AKA: acid

Despite their different chemical compositions, all of these drugs cause the user to experience terrifying hallucinations. The effect of these hallucinations is so intense that long-term misuse of psychedelic drugs causes memory loss, mental illness and alopecia.

The warning signs that your child may be abusing psychedelic drugs are more apparent than for other drugs: long hair, facial hair, loose-fitting clothing, ear/body piercings and tattoos are all reliable indicators that your son or daughter is addicted to psychedelics.

Music is an essential part of the psychedelic "experience". If your child regularly listens to music from the 1960s, it is likely that drug-induced hallucinations are forcing him/her to vainly attempt to relive the Summer of Love.

Gathering evidence

After reading the preceding lowdown on drugs, you may have recognised some of the warning signs that your child is a drug addict. Your suspicions may be aroused further when your son asks you for money. Perhaps he needs this money to pay his drug dealer? Is your daughter struggling at school? This could be due to brain damage caused by addiction to narcotics. Alternatively, if your child shows little sporting ability, this may be due to the toxic side-effects of drug abuse.

If you suspect that your child may be hooked on drugs, it is your duty to find evidence of his/her habit. Some effective strategies for investigating your child's addiction include:

Thoroughly search your child's bedroom, leaving no stone unturned. Don't forget to look under the bed and in drawers, wardrobes and the pockets of clothing.
If your daughter keeps a diary, use this to your advantage. Read her diary to gain an insight into her lifestyle and her circle of friends. You may discover that her "boyfriend" is really her dealer or pimp.
If your son uses the Internet, read his email. Don't forget to read outgoing email, not just those he has received from others. Check the "History" of web pages he has visited, to look for further incriminating evidence.
Try to overhear your child's telephone calls. Listen out for key phrases, such as the street names of drugs.
Talk to your child's teachers, to find out if they have noticed any abnormal behaviour. Remember that teachers share your concern for the wellbeing of your offspring, and they will be pleased to assist with your investigations.

At this stage, do not attempt to ask your child directly about his drug habit.

How to help your child

Once you have gathered evidence that your son or daughter is a drug addict, it is time to take swift and decisive action. Be warned, your child will lie to you and will try to convince you that he is not abusing drugs. Remember that your child is in the grip of powerful mind-altering substances and will stop at nothing to ensure that he gets his next fix. Do not listen to these lies!

Countless medical studies have shown that "cold turkey" (i.e. immediate withdrawal from the drug) is the most effective way to beat addiction. Attempts to gradually wean an addict from the source of his addiction, by using a substitute such as methodone for example, inevitably fail and should therefore not be considered. To ensure that your child overcomes his addiction, you must act on his behalf to distance him from his drug-abusing lifestyle. The best way to achieve this is to:

Ground your child. Your child will not be able to abuse drugs while confined to the safe and loving family home.
Stop your child's allowance. If your child has no money, she will not be able to buy drugs.
Confiscate computers, mobile phones and cars. Ensure that your child has no means of communicating with his so-called friends who have led him astray.
Take your child to school each morning and collect him at the end of the school day. Ask teachers to keep your child alone in a locked classroom at lunchtime. This will ensure that your child has no contact with undesirable influences.

Final thoughts

I hope this article will serve as a useful guide in helping you to cure your child's drug addiction. I wish you the best of luck and I hope your child experiences a speedy recovery!

	Helping parents. (4.20 / 5) (#3)
	by because it isnt on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 05:29:56 AM PST

	I notice in your section on "Gathering evidence", you recommend that parents search their children's bedrooms, etc. Personally, I find that this does not go far enough, and the little bastards are still capable of getting their fix of "cake". Therefore I have instituted a "zero tolerance" policy in my household. The key factor to this policy is permanent nudity in the family home. Obviously I would not put my children out on the street naked, but once they return from school, their clothes are hung up with their shoes and bags, in the porch. This has cause the drug-intake in my house to plummet. In their natural form, I can also see if my children have been injecting in their veins, or if any parts of their body have "melted" (one of the side-effects of taking "cake"). Unfortunately, this scheme is still not 100% effective, as my children are still somehow taking drugs, so I have recently begun a regime of cavity searches before bedtime. I know it sounds harsh, but I love my children, and I do not want them to become mere statistics in the War against Drugs. adequacy.org -- because it isn't

	Haha. (none / 0) (#10)
	by tkatchev on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 11:07:52 AM PST

	Very funny. This might seem like fun and games to you while you are a teenager. In reality, drugs are not something you joke about. I know this sounds very trite, but please don't. Laughing about drug abuse is about as tactful as kicking premature babies and making fun of leukemia patients. Please do not. I am completely serious. -- Peace and much love...

	Life is too short... (none / 0) (#16)
	by The Mad Scientist on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 04:42:13 PM PST

	...to have even a single thing to not laugh about.

	Life is too short... (5.00 / 1) (#25)
	by tkatchev on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 11:14:59 PM PST

	...to be quoting retarded aphorisms. -- Peace and much love...

	PURE COMEDY GOLD (none / 0) (#23)
	by Anonymous Reader on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 09:06:47 PM PST

	<i>Laughing about drug abuse is about as tactful as kicking premature babies and making fun of leukemia patients</i> Yup. That's why I laugh about drug abuse.

	Greetings! (4.00 / 1) (#30)
	by because it isnt on Wed May 22nd, 2002 at 06:02:45 AM PST

	This might seem like fun and games to you while you are a teenager. You're back to your old ad hominem tricks, tkatchev. Labelling your opponents as children is naughty. As for laughing at drug abuse, I assume you frown upon all drama featuring the Drunken Scotsman stereotype. Making fun of leukemia patients is quite alright yes because it's, um, a taboo yes isn't it so that's OK. adequacy.org -- because it isn't

	teenagers (5.00 / 1) (#37)
	by gNinja on Wed May 22nd, 2002 at 10:43:41 AM PST

	Tkatchev called the poster "teenger", not "child." I think most people recognize the differences between children and teenagers. Teenagers are basically whiney adults with bad complexions and crippling levels of naivete.

	Exactly. (none / 0) (#38)
	by tkatchev on Wed May 22nd, 2002 at 10:59:31 AM PST

	Teenagers are basically adults who wish that the rest of us would keep treating them as children. This is why they are so annoying. -- Peace and much love...

	Tell it to tkatchev first. (none / 0) (#39)
	by because it isnt on Wed May 22nd, 2002 at 11:13:14 AM PST

	From one of his recent comments: elenchos... ...is a child, my dear. There was a post where he admitted that he's 16 years old... Presumably one of the "differences" between children and teenagers would be that teenagers are "teen-aged", i.e. between 13 and 19. adequacy.org -- because it isn't

	Serious? (1.00 / 1) (#47)
	by Anonymous Reader on Wed May 22nd, 2002 at 07:26:37 PM PST

	I am completely serious. Then you're on the wrong fucking site.

	You sux. (none / 0) (#54)
	by tkatchev on Thu May 23rd, 2002 at 01:13:55 PM PST

	Go back to masturbating in real life and leave us healthy people alone, K? -- Peace and much love...

	Because, remember folks.... (none / 0) (#27)
	by gordonjcp on Wed May 22nd, 2002 at 02:38:22 AM PST

	... "Cake" is a made-up drug.

	ADVERT (5.00 / 1) (#58)
	by because it isnt on Fri May 24th, 2002 at 02:26:53 AM PST

	"Brass Eye" DVD out now, folks. Fifteen quid from play.com. Buy one now and get a free blow-job from Armando Iannucci. `: or possibly Angus Deayton. While stocks last.` adequacy.org -- because it isn't

	Thank you for your clarification (none / 0) (#51)
	by Anonymous Reader on Thu May 23rd, 2002 at 12:23:40 PM PST

	of these critical issues. In addition, I suggest that parents need to cleanse the minds of their offspring through time-tested family values such as used by the North Koreans on their captives during the Korean conflict. Such techniques include: placing a metal pail over the head and pounding it with a stick until the child confesses, then, when beaten into submission, indoctrinating them into the correct thought of Saint Harrison (of narcotic act fame) and other abolitionist thinkers.

	Eh (none / 0) (#48)
	by tkatchev on Wed May 22nd, 2002 at 11:06:29 PM PST

	Go kill yourself. Thx. -- Peace and much love...

	Now you're getting it (1.00 / 1) (#50)
	by Anonymous Reader on Thu May 23rd, 2002 at 09:56:54 AM PST

	You fucking imbecile.

	You being way off on your storys! (none / 0) (#102)
	by Anonymous Reader on Thu May 30th, 2002 at 06:03:59 AM PST

	I have read an e-mail about exploring the miths on teenage drug use and felt pretty offended about you people bad mouthing the music and that you are putting a message through that modern music and drugs go hand in hand. I am a club dj and also produce my own music. Yes there are drugs in clubs...... as anywhere else. Your research is not up to scrach either.People are sending this mail around saying that it is a good laugh! Dont take this up the wrong way, i am only trying to help you to help people in the right way, Please get back to me..... Antonn@nedcor.com

	BIGGEST LOAD OF S&^% (none / 0) (#104)
	by Anonymous Reader on Thu May 30th, 2002 at 07:25:39 AM PST

	I've just read your articles on Drug use. Not only are they Biased, Blatantly subjective and in fact completely fictional. There's more Fact's in Tabloid magazines than in this article. According to who ever wrote this, 75% of youngsters have experimented with Drugs. 75% of which Nation. Half the world's youngsters can't even get food never mind drugs. Also If I smoke, Use gum and have long hair I'm addicted to Heroin, Crack, Ecstasy, Acid and Dagga Plus the children listening to 60's music is a good indicator. For Pete's sake The 60's where days of Heroin, Coke, etc not really E and A. (Even though E was first legally used in Europe as far back as 1900 as a Diet pill) E users far prefer, Dance or Electronic music, as you would say. If you are going to be narrow-minded at least get your fucking facts right

	While I appplaud iat's effort (5.00 / 2) (#4)
	by Adam Rightmann on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 05:57:36 AM PST

	I find the lack of faith based intiaitives incredible. As most studies have indicated, failing to attend Church regularly is one of the biggest indicators of drug addiction. If you bring your children to Sunday Mass, and Thursday night Mass and Saturday afternoon Mass, you will find that they have the strength of character and critical thinking skills needed to resist henious attempts at drug addictions by the local Communist led drug pushers. A. Rightmann

	In addition to attending Mass, (1.00 / 1) (#62)
	by Anonymous Reader on Fri May 24th, 2002 at 03:09:49 PM PST

	one should consider all varieties of religious services. Certainly Mass should not be limited to the "white" mass; black masses may provide an entertaining and educational contrast, as would attendance at 7th-day, Jehova's Witnesses, Millerites (especially Branch Davidian) and other Christian varieties. Branching out, one can balance these with various Islamic, Hindu, Buddhist and other religions, including the ritual cannabalism of brains in the South Pacific tribes who develop Kuru, a form of spongiform encephalopathy similar to Mad Cow disease and, now, Mad Deer Disease in Idaho, which is probabably what most teenagers suffer from anyway.

	Wrong spelling (3.00 / 1) (#5)
	by Q on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 06:26:14 AM PST

	It's methadone. C21-H27-NO .

	Non-exhaustive, yet greater dangers may still lurk (5.00 / 1) (#6)
	by jer on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 07:38:48 AM PST

	While I agree that 'Jack', 'Crank', 'Dope', 'Charlie', 'Smack', and 'Moe' are all dangerous substances which parents must be ever-vigilant for, a word of caution must be given to any parent who uses only this list to check if their Johnnies and/or Suzies are doped up on the funny-flower. A recent trend has seen substances, which can be nothing but illegal, appear in local convenience stores, supermarkets, and gas stations around the globe. These products claim to "provide a kick of energy", or otherwise "energize" a person upon consumption. Perhaps the most well known of these new beverage-drugs is called Red Bull. Red Bull, a drink by an Austrian company of the same name, is named after a famous Cherokee Indian Chief who was known for massive opium usage. Red Bull is marketed at today's teen who needs an "extra rush of energy". What parents aren't aware of is just how dangerous these beverages are. As a chemist, I have had a unique opportunity to examine this product for myself. In each can of Red Bull, there exists a trace concoction of 90% Ephedrine (which in itself has been linked with stroke and cardiac arrest)and 10% Methamphetamine. That's right, Methamphetamine. Speed, Meth, Ice, Fire, Glass. How have the makers of Red Bull been able to sell this product through the market? Deception. Red Bull claims that their beverage contains Taurine, an essential amino acid. Ask any respected chemist, and they'll tell you that Taurine is just as real as Fullerene. Taurine comes from the latin "Taurus-", or Bull; and "-ine", or juice. Literally, they are selling our children drugs powerful enough to stimulate a 1400lb bull -- not an amino acid as they claim. How are they capable of getting away with this, you ask? Wouldn't the Food and Drug Administration step in and claim foul play? While I cannot assume government kickbacks, I know that Red Bull is an Austrian company, so I would assume foul play is involved. Parents, I urge you to check your child's beverage consumption. If you find a can of Red Bull, your child may be strung out at that very moment. Make no mistake -- your child is intelligent enough to consume an entire bottle of Cough Syrup for the hallucinogenic DXM within -- don't assume he or she wouldn't consume an entire case of Red Bull to get his speed fix.

	That is not all (5.00 / 1) (#8)
	by walwyn on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 07:59:58 AM PST

	Kids can be extremely tricky and often feign the symptoms of asthma so that they can obtain inhalers. The active incredients when boiled out of the wadding are used to get a "wheeze" as it is called. Similar tricks are played during the summer to obtain "hayfever inhalers" which contain adrenaline.

	Inhalers (5.00 / 1) (#19)
	by cheetah on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 06:08:42 PM PST

	are also often used by people to "expand their lungs" prior to having a "bong". Apparently it increases the surface area that can absorb the appropriate chemicals, for example, THC with cannabis, thus giving a larger "hit" or "high" than would usually be possible. Then again, it's no different to people pumping on on pseudoephydrine (?) tablets (e.g. sudafed) before going out drinking, is it? Just another "legal" way to space yourself out as much as possible.

	Teenagers particularly (none / 0) (#28)
	by walwyn on Wed May 22nd, 2002 at 05:07:23 AM PST

	need to "expand their lungs" as they do not have sufficient ridges in the brain for the smoke to flow along, which is the most affective way of getting the drug to the brain's pleasure receptors. Teenagers, having a particular smooth cerebal cortex, need to supplent the 'hit' by getting the drug to the brain indirectly through the blood supple.

	You've taken that too far. [n/t] (none / 0) (#55)
	by because it isnt on Thu May 23rd, 2002 at 03:23:36 PM PST

	adequacy.org -- because it isn't

	It is a chilling thought (n/t) (none / 0) (#56)
	by walwyn on Fri May 24th, 2002 at 02:00:18 AM PST

	What a bunch of BS (none / 0) (#31)
	by Anonymous Reader on Wed May 22nd, 2002 at 06:57:58 AM PST

	I can't believe you're spitting out that crap about Red Bull, and I can't believe anyone would be moronic enough to believe it. Not only is it embarrassing to me, but it's basically calling our government a bunch of morons. I don't think the FDA would be so foolish as to let a class 4 drug to be passed on to the public in a beverage. Please.

	Why not! (none / 0) (#46)
	by walwyn on Wed May 22nd, 2002 at 02:07:33 PM PST

	They allow coca-cola.

	I am confused. (1.00 / 2) (#7)
	by hettb on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 07:58:33 AM PST

	When I read the title of your article, "Exploding the Myths of Teenage Drug Use", I hoped I would find some argumentative material which would help me refute the communo-nietzschean propaganda that today's youth is being permanently exposed to. But you didn't even list any of those myths, let alone explode them! Please tell us: What are the myths of teenage drug use? Hooray.

	The Weed Menace (5.00 / 4) (#9)
	by Icebox on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 09:06:37 AM PST

	Weed has been proven, time and time again by respected scientists, to be the #1 drug related menace facing society today. While The Weed itself will not necessarily produce the debilitating effects that interveinous herion injection will, your child will almost certainly end up moving on to much harder drugs after a short period of experimentation with The Weed. Even if he or she is among the 2% or so Weed users who don't end up on crack they will no doubt suffer lifelong disability from smoking just a few joints. Let me relate a little story: I was once a model young person. I was involved in a number of extracirricular activities, got good grades, and was on track to get into an Ivy league school. I played baseball, the American pastime. I went to church regularly. My clothes were trendy and so were my friends. Almost no acne appeared on my face. One day my virgin girlfriend and I were driving downtown in my convertible on our way to the zoo. Upon arriving in the parking lot a young man appeared out of nowhere, wearing a black Anthrax T shirt and cheap shoes, obviously a disadvantaged inner city youth. Before I could offer him a 'salvation card' my church had provided me for just such an occasion he said "Want to go to a bake sale at 4:20?". A bake sale? Being the eager to contribute to any cause we could both my virgin girlfriend and I jumped at the opportunity. To make a long story short, there was no bake sale, that was just code for smoking Weed and before we could turn around and run both my girlfriend and I had caught a contact high. By approximately 4:30 my girlfriend had lost her virginity in the back seat of my Saab 900, she ended up working in the porn industry instead of going to Columbia like she was supposed to, I barely graduted from high school because I spent most of my time stealing radar detectors and car stereos, I have virtually no recollection of a two year period of my life that friends tell me I spent drinking malt liqour and concocting various blends of drugs in a bent spoon. At one point a few of the friends who's lives I didn't destroy locked me in a cellar as an 'intervention', only to find out that it contain approximately 10 cases of wine, which I consumed in short order to fuel the drug induced fire of self destruction that had taken over my body. Luckily these friends had some guts, because they left me in there until I had consumed all the wine, sobered up, and gone through the lengthy period of withdrawal that all Weed addicts have to face sooner or later. Keep my story in mind if you decide to comment on Mr. iat's article. You addicts might have a bone to pick because he isn't up on the latest street jargon, but the gist of the thing is spot on. Stay the hell off drugs. Science, and personal experience, has shown that they only bring misery.

	please (none / 0) (#24)
	by Anonymous Reader on Tue May 21st, 2002 at 09:10:43 PM PST

	Kids these days call it "the marijuana."

	another effect of massive drug use (none / 0) (#52)
	by Anonymous Reader on Thu May 23rd, 2002 at 12:29:48 PM PST

	is the artificial prolongation of life, leading to the depletion of the Social Security fund. Drugs preserve the body by arresting the mind, and this preservation leads to a paradoxical state of increasing physical decrepitude but increased longevity (since the individual loses all ititiative, he/she never exerts and thus never strains anything and never dies). In order to maintain our American Way of Life, it is essential that our population work themselves to death by age 65, otherwise our economy will be ruined by supporting these opium-preserved walking dead through centuries of government dole. -work is the curse of the drinking class-

	I hope you are fucking kidding. (none / 0) (#111)
	by Anonymous Reader on Sun Jun 23rd, 2002 at 09:42:32 PM PST

	Er..... sorry to tell you, but you're a complete liar. I don't see how you could figure that there is a 2% rate of people who don't end up on crack from smoking pot. If that was true than 65% of the US would be crack addicts. You need to get your facts straight. I know its hard for you to grasp (being a complete lamer and all), but your friends, and probably people in your family have tried pot. They may not admit it, but I would bet you that is the case. For yor information, many European countries surgeon generals (even in our own country), have stated that marijuana can be beneficial in dealing with fatigue in cancer and aids patients. It can induce hunger in anorexic (maybe it could help your "ex-virgin" girlfriend. I would also bet you that your girlfriend didn't end up in the porn business because of pot, but as a result of the supression of sexual expression, and probably from being locked up by her (obviously) over-religious, opressive parents. Another thing I dont understand is why you treat sex as a dirty thing. You wouldn't be here if there was no sex. Apparently your balls were chopped off and you were fed estrogen tabs, cause you act like a fucking nun. I mean, I'm a chick and I am more sexed than you. You also must be obsessive compulsive, cause marijuana is NOT physically addictive, and if you have a Saab (get a real car, you pussy), and a girlfriend who was supposed to go to columbia, one would have to suppose you were wealthy, and therefore would not need to steal car sterios to support your obsessive habit with a relatively inexpensive (coughdirt cheapcough) drug. Your story (as that seems to be all it is) is full of inadequacies, and all it makes you is ignorant (not suprising for someone who goes to church bake sales). Why don't you do your research in the future before wasting peoples time with your bullshit propaganda, obviously information given to you by D.A.R.E (the very allies of a law enforcement institution (CIA) who has been seen (by me), buying a schmorgasboard of drugs in the wonderful country of Belize.) It is all a bullshit method of providing reverse psychology mindwashing, so you'll go out and buy the drugs. Oh, by the way, please kill yourself, because all you are doing is wasting the holy air that your ficticious god has blessed us all with. XskippyX Xforever agnosticX