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 The evils of smoking.

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Jul 27, 2002
Why do people smoke? Are there any benefits that can't be obtained through cleaner drugs such as Rat Poison or bleach? Why do fat chicks keep smoking? All this and more!
Smoking is a disgusting habit. Thanks to you insensitive fuckheads out there (that is, smokers) I am unable to go out for an enjoyable night of drinking a few ales with friends without coming home with my clothes smelling fucking terrible. Not only that I've probably increased by succeptability to lung cancer a bit more just by sitting within 20 metres of your filthy carcinogen inhaling presence.

If you're going to kill yourself at least have the decency to do it like a real person and step in front of a bus, or put on an N*Sync CD and blow your fucking brains out with a shotgun. All you're doing is poisoning me, poisoning yourself and generally being anti-social.

On the plus side, your spending AU$10 on a packet of death sticks is providing me with free Government Health Care and a decent public transport system. However, at least the heroin addicts have the decency to participate in their filthy habit in their own homes or so called "shooting galleries".

One reason people, okay let's narrow that down - women, take up smoking is to lose weight. However many times I see a fat bitch smoking. If it's not working for you why persist? Again, if you're just trying to kill yourself there are better ways to do it. If you're trying to lose weight try something radical like, I don't know, STOP FUCKING EATING SO MUCH.

In summary, if you're a smoker kindly fuck off and die.


Radical idea (none / 0) (#1)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 08:03:41 AM PST
I have studied mountains of literature on this smoking phenomenon, and after years of dedicated research I have developed an absolutely astounding yet highly plausible theorem: Smokers smoke primarily because they find doing so to be enjoyable.

Same with serial killers (none / 0) (#2)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 09:52:36 AM PST
Serial Killers enjoy serial killing, that doesn't make it right. Please keep your first grade logic away from adequacy in future.

Thank you. (0.00 / 1) (#5)
by tkatchev on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 11:17:03 AM PST
The parent poster seems to be suffering from a severe liberalism poisoning.

Peace and much love...

Basic reading comprehension skills (none / 0) (#7)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 01:12:50 PM PST
First sentence of article:
Why do people smoke?
Intention of comment:
Explain why people smoke.
Quality of comment content in relation to comment intention:
Intention of AC reply to comment:
Detract from parent comment by claiming lack of applicability to article.
Quality of reply content in relation to reply intention:
Very low.
Secondary intention of AC reply:
Belittle the logical skills of the parent comment.
Result of secondary intention:
Utter failure.

Sir, (0.00 / 1) (#9)
by tkatchev on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 02:15:57 PM PST
You suck.

Peace and much love...

wrong (none / 0) (#10)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 05:41:58 PM PST
The "smoking is fun" guy was trying to be funny but was not. Worse it was factually incorrect. Smokers mostly smoke because they are addicted. Most try to quit but can not.

The second post about serial killers was funny and factually acturate.

Um... No. (none / 0) (#11)
by zikzak on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 10:35:23 PM PST
Like the original comment states, smokers smoke because they enjoy smoking. I can only assume you don't smoke, because if you did you would know how much of a lie it is to state that the primary draw for a smoker is addiction.

Smokers try to quit because:
a) They know it is bad for them
b) It is expensive
c) People nag the shit out of them.

Do you honestly believe millions and millions of people are doing something they don't enjoy simply because they are addicted to it? Or has it ever occurred to you that if tobacco wasn't enjoyable then nobody would ever have bothered getting themselves addicted to it in the first place?

Ask any smoker if they would continue to smoke if tobacco was cheap, safe and non-addictive. Here's a hint: We might smoke less, but we'd still smoke.

um yes! (0.00 / 1) (#12)
by tkatchev on Sun Jul 28th, 2002 at 01:54:34 AM PST
In that case, Sir, why not try something like sniffing superglue? Not only is it much more "fun" than tobacco, it is also incredibly cheap, non-addictive, and best of all, completely legal.

Peace and much love...

It's nowhere near as cool (none / 0) (#13)
by T Reginald Gibbons on Sun Jul 28th, 2002 at 02:02:42 AM PST
Also, it gives you disfiguring facial sores.

Paraplegia is the new cool. (1.00 / 1) (#14)
by because it isnt on Sun Jul 28th, 2002 at 07:21:34 AM PST
Go on, Reggie, give it a bash. Sucks to have 4 limbs, dude. -- because it isn't

Au contraire (none / 0) (#15)
by First Incision on Mon Jul 29th, 2002 at 10:05:29 PM PST
In the US, sniffing glue is illegal. But I have never heard of anyone being booked for it. I suppose you would have to be actually sniffing it in front of a police officer.
Do you suffer from late-night hacking? Ask your doctor about Protonix.

Mmm no... (none / 0) (#17)
by jvance on Mon Jul 29th, 2002 at 11:35:37 PM PST
I trd tht bt I gt my nstrls stck sht.
Adequacy has turned into a cesspool consisting of ... blubbering, superstitious fools arguing with smug, pseudointellectual assholes. -AR

I need a smoke. (none / 0) (#19)
by walwyn on Tue Jul 30th, 2002 at 03:09:58 PM PST
Its been 6 weeks since me last tab. My partner was meant to have given up at the same time - but I know she hasn't, and know where her stash is - and tonight I need a smoke.

You would have thought, after all this time, I wouldn't but I do. I've been up and down the stairs three times, scoffed the box Belgian chocs, and now I want a smoke.

AU needs to get with the 21century. (5.00 / 2) (#3)
by faustus on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 10:29:28 AM PST
It's not suprising that an Isle of english criminals, can't figure out the simplest solution to this problem: ban smoking inside. It's great! Here in socialist Canada, I can go to a pub 5 days in a row and wear the same pants, shirt (inside out by day 3), socks, and spiderman underpants, simply because they haven't been contaminated by that god awful pastime known as smoking.

The good think about smokers is as you pointed out, their wonderful contributions to the Healthcare system. Not only do smokers enjoy being raped when buying a pack, smokers are statistically lower income earners, the same people who buy the state run lottery scams. These "lottos" in conjuntion with the smoking tax, and the seal hunt tax, help to pay for my weekly prosthetic leg checkup and goldplated dialysis machine.

This calls for a legalization of all drugs. The government can make so much money allowing people to kill themselves, why not go for broke? Legalize, then tax the shit out of heroin, coke, THE DANK NUGGZ, diesel fuel, the list goes on. This way I could collect twice as much unemployment benifits as I currently do, while working on my numerous adult websites.

--You seem to be suffering from a liberal-arts education.

Holy crap! (none / 0) (#20)
by m on Wed Jul 31st, 2002 at 05:29:10 AM PST
I've always wanted to go to Canada, and I didn't even know that smoking fact! I'm packing my bags and heading over to have sex with your hot Canadian women!

All in a smoke free environment.

I like overweight chicks who smoke (1.00 / 2) (#4)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 10:32:50 AM PST
Why in the world do you hate oral sex? I like it when women "smoke my schlong." Even fat chicks; it's still enjoyable. If you clothes smell terrible, you need to aim differently.

Hmm looks familiar (none / 0) (#6)
by Narcissus on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 12:51:39 PM PST
Does anyone else, though I'm not sure they're aired outside the U.S., think that this diary resembles one of those truth commercials; however, in this case it would be a late night HBO version because of the language.

Ok, who picked the flower???

hmmm (none / 0) (#8)
by scone on Sat Jul 27th, 2002 at 01:32:50 PM PST
i don't think smoking is inherently evil, it's just a matter of conditioning... the longer you hang around with cool smoking persons, the sooner you'll learn to love that wonderful ashy aroma... you will begin to seek it out, to tip ashtrays over your head and rub it joyously into your clothes... think about it, when you smell clothes impregnated with the lovely odour of tobacco smoke, isn't it happiness you feel, really?

A question (none / 0) (#16)
by First Incision on Mon Jul 29th, 2002 at 10:12:30 PM PST
I have a related question for readers living in liberalist Left-Coast enclaves.

It is not too common to see openly butchy lesbians around here, but the other day, I saw lesbian smoking. I was confused. Smoking has always seemed eerily phallic to me. I associate smoking with slutty trailer-park women, effeminite theatre major hipsters, repressed homosexual rednecks, and repressed homosexual ghetto boys.

Maybe I know nothing, because of my limited exposure to lesbians. But smoking struck me as very un-lesbian.
Do you suffer from late-night hacking? Ask your doctor about Protonix.

Even lesbians can be gullible. (none / 0) (#18)
by because it isnt on Tue Jul 30th, 2002 at 01:04:24 AM PST
Either that, or she's having TG fantasies. Follow her back home and see if she breaks out the Havananan dildo set. -- because it isn't


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