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Best part of working at Microsoft
Offices instead of cubes 17%
Free soda 17%
Popcorn machines 0%
Flexible hours 0%
Relaxed Atmosphere 0%
Hallways clogged with obsolete pcs 3%
Internal documentation 0%
"Ship It" awards 3%
Cocaine fueled gay sex marathons with Steve Ballmer 39%
Stealing office supplies 17%

Votes: 28


 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Apr 22, 2002
I'm heading back to Microsoft in the morning. I start my new job at 9am sharp. If I was any more excited you'd hear denim ripping.

Microsoft is without question the best place I've ever worked. How about you?


More diaries by Peter Johnson
Psycho Ex Girlfriends
Looking for pain in all the wrong places
You win some, you lose some
Sermon On The Mount
Moods for moderns
Under the Bridge
Lovers Arrival, The
The Width Of A Circle
A Shocking Discovery
A Woman Waits For Me?
there is no god but shoeboy
Gimme Danger
Girlfriend is better
Happy birthday to me
Like A Virgin
Silencing The Aryan King
Should I make the switch to OS X?
New Feature
Girlfriend is better


It would have to be my job with USX. (5.00 / 1) (#2)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Apr 23rd, 2002 at 06:02:23 AM PST
Were you expecting me to tell of my time spent with Microsoft?

Not only did I not have to think all day, but I never really had to do any work either. The employers did not expect much and we did our best to live up to their expection. Most of my time was spent relaxing.

While my pay for this 'labor' was a mere $15.35 an hour, unlike you when I 'worked' on Holidays, I got paid more (Double time 30.70 an hour). In addition, since I was not the companies bitch, when they expected me to 'work' for more than my regular scheduled 8 hour day, I got paid time and a half. My suggestion is to cover your bung, cuz your gonna take it in the ass time and time again staying late reporting on bugs. Get used to working for free.

Of course the prestige for being a cog in the wheel of the worlds largest steel producer is not quite as high as it would be working for a software hacking firm, I always left work with a clear conscious knowing my product was free from error, and I could sleep at night knowing that the fine people I worked with would not cut my throat to advance in their career.

BTW, when does your job as a software tester start?

Sorry (none / 0) (#3)
by Peter Johnson on Tue Apr 23rd, 2002 at 06:20:43 AM PST
Not a software tester. I'm afraid I'm not at liberty to disclose my actual duties, but I certainly will get paid more and work better hours than the testers.

Are you adequate?

A union pay scale maintance engineer? (none / 0) (#4)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Apr 23rd, 2002 at 09:33:22 AM PST

USX (5.00 / 1) (#8)
by hauntedattics on Tue Apr 23rd, 2002 at 12:28:26 PM PST
USX, eh? Did you enjoy watching your union dues pay for the next global trade war?

Trade war? (none / 0) (#10)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Apr 23rd, 2002 at 01:10:37 PM PST
You must be referring to the little steel tariff thing.

Are you really so certain it was my union dues that were responsible? I am curious to know how you came to that conclusion. The evidence clearly shows something slightly contrary.

I am sorry to say that although I find most of your comments brilliant and difficult to disagree with, you have made an incorrect association in this case.

First, the Democratic leadership throughout the years of our struggle (steel dumping, as we call it has been happening throughout the 90's) never lifted a finger to help in this cause.

Turn the clock back to the 1980's, when Ronald Regan was president. He saved the steel industry by imposing tariffs, God bless him. I mention this to try to draw a parallel between the current government and that one.

Quite clearly the current `trade war', as you call it, did not happen until there was Republican leadership in the Whitehouse. So it seems we history repeating itself. My guess is that United States Steel (a rather large corporation) might have lobbied for it, rather than see its stock plummet further. It could be that the unions did not object, and while the union dues paid by my brothers and sisters may not have been responsible for the tariff, they did not cause it.

Is it possible there could be support for this from both sides of the isle? How else do you think it happened so easily?

Unions and the trade war. (none / 0) (#14)
by hauntedattics on Wed Apr 24th, 2002 at 06:18:45 AM PST
Apologies for the flippant comment about unions causing the trade war. From what I've read, it was the entire steel industry that influenced GWB on the tariffs issue, not just the unions. As a free trade advocate whose views are right in line with those of The Economist, I was just disappointed that Bush didn't choose to promote the U.S. as a model of free trade for other countries to follow.

Do you have evidence of steel dumping by other countries? I'm sure it exists, I just haven't seen anything about it. I guess I'm worried about how increases in steel prices will affect other sectors of the economy, manufacturing in particular.

Thanks for the compliment on my posts, by the way. I don't know how brilliant they are, but I work hard to make them hard to disagree with. It's the diplomat in me.

Reply: (none / 0) (#15)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Apr 24th, 2002 at 06:48:35 AM PST
I have no details, I believe most of it is from Japan and Brazil, though more is coming from Russia and Ukraine.

MLP for Haunted (none / 0) (#18)
by derek3000 on Wed Apr 24th, 2002 at 01:28:31 PM PST

"Feel me when I bring it!" --Gay Jamie

Hey... (none / 0) (#22)
by hauntedattics on Thu Apr 25th, 2002 at 05:55:47 AM PST
that's Lady Smartingford. I wouldn't want people assuming that the only pretentious losers here are guys.

Mr. Johnson, how old are you? [n/t] (5.00 / 1) (#5)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Apr 23rd, 2002 at 10:00:38 AM PST

Now we know why Microsoft is so shitty [n/t] (5.00 / 1) (#6)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Apr 23rd, 2002 at 10:12:59 AM PST

Rudeness. (5.00 / 1) (#9)
by tkatchev on Tue Apr 23rd, 2002 at 12:31:05 PM PST
It's a penis-size complex.

Peace and much love...

Hey! (1.00 / 1) (#11)
by alice on Tue Apr 23rd, 2002 at 07:08:50 PM PST
Where'd my comment go? Is somebody mad at me?

At first sight it was sweet (1.00 / 1) (#13)
by walwyn on Wed Apr 24th, 2002 at 06:09:13 AM PST
.. but then when you thought about it: very unkind and personal.

Are you (1.00 / 1) (#16)
by poltroon on Wed Apr 24th, 2002 at 07:25:10 AM PST
claiming responsibility for this heinous act of censorship?

PS. Unkind? I don't understand.

I don't have the power (1.00 / 1) (#17)
by walwyn on Wed Apr 24th, 2002 at 07:41:17 AM PST
the message is not simply hidden it appears to have gone. My guess is that a friend of PJ removed before he could see it.

My time with the USMC in vietnam was the best. (1.00 / 1) (#12)
by John Wainright on Wed Apr 24th, 2002 at 01:41:16 AM PST
I was with the Radio Section, Communication Platoon. Headquarters and Service Company. 2nd Battalion 9th Marine Regiment, 3rd Marine Division, from June of 1965 to August of 1966.

As a radio operator part of my job was a FORWARD OBSERVER RADIO OPERATOR, and to call in motars, artillery and air strikes on enemy positions. To do this I had to be on the front lines and some times in front of them. In several occasions I had to engage the enemy in close hand to hand combat near the DMZ.

On one of our missions near Chu-Li we killed Ho Chi Minh's adopted son, he was a general in the North Vietmese Army. After this NVA had standing orders to wipe out our battalion.
Out of more than 1,700 men that went to Viet Nam with our battalion, after being thier for 13 months only about 75 walked back. In one night, due to a rocket and mortar attack we lost almost 250 men, KIA's AND MIA's.

Tough call... (3.00 / 2) (#19)
by chloedancer on Wed Apr 24th, 2002 at 03:46:54 PM PST
Maybe it was the time I spent as a suicide hotline phoneworker. Successfully talking novice computer users through real mode registry hacks in the aftermath of malicious code nastiness was always a rush (again, over the phone). Working as a figure model for artists wasn't a bad gig, either. And occasionally tending bar at my favorite Irish pub in the Vieux Carré was always a blast.

You can have my share of Microsoft, ma cher. May it be less frustrating than your last gig, 'eh?

remedial french (5.00 / 1) (#20)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Apr 24th, 2002 at 05:01:55 PM PST
That would be mon cher - unless there's something weird going on, in which case it would be ma chère. Either way. I would probably use 'cheri' anyhow.

Remedial Cajun (3.00 / 2) (#21)
by chloedancer on Wed Apr 24th, 2002 at 07:42:38 PM PST
Oops... Your narrow-mindedness is showing! Provincial dialects often exercise creative licence, 'eh?

provincial dialects? (none / 0) (#23)
by Anonymous Reader on Thu Apr 25th, 2002 at 11:58:51 AM PST
Racist. I suppose next you'll be sneering at Senegal and Québec.

My Job as a Stagehand (none / 0) (#24)
by gzt on Thu Apr 25th, 2002 at 02:48:11 PM PST
On Tuesday, I get to work the barricades for the Dave Matthews Band concert. That means I get paid to stand in front of the stage, six feet from Dave Matthews, and stare at the crowd.

The next Saturday, Weezer is coming to town. I'm not working it, I'm just getting free tickets.

Of course, the twenty-hour days of manual labor are a bit rough at times, but I don't work much. Usually it's fun stuff.

In the theatre, sometimes a ballet will come through and only two people on the crew will speak English, the others speak a kind of French and Russian mix (?). Other times they're Spanish, or sometimes Mexican. But all the American roadies speak with a Southern accent.

Nearly everybody working at the coliseum and the theatre are studying comp sci or computer engineering at the university. And but they aren't commie Lenixists, they're drinkers. It's wonderful.


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