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Best physics invention?
TheVomit-fueled-car. 0%
The Vomit-super-conductor. 0%
The Vomit-flux-capacitor. 44%
The Vomit-anti-ICBM-defense-tower 55%

Votes: 9

 Projectile vomiting

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Mar 23, 2002
I'm not a booze hound. I will drink occasionally, and don't mind getting slightly buzzed, so long as I am in 90% control of my body.

More diaries by Shinkansen
Well... I'm not sure about this.
I don't think that alcohol is a bad thing at all. Last night several of my friends decided they were going to get "sloshed". I'm sure its a great time, you know, everything is funnier, you are more relaxed, and you could wind up with some male/female (it really doesn't matter to some after a point...) that you have never met and won't remember the name of in the morning. The thing is I don't like getting drunk, it't not all that fun to me. After living in Milwaukee for a while drinking parties lose their appeal, so, i knew the drinking would get Holy-jesus-fucking-shit out of hand.

It started around 8:00 pm last night. At about this time I had reached the plateu phase of boredom in my room and decided to get a net game of IceWind Dale going. (Ahh good ole friday nights.. There was a pool tourney, but they called me and said it was canceled.. i was sad.) There was all sorts of boozin going on, I stopped in their room a couple times to see the progression. You know, all sorts of beer and a giant plastic bottle of "some unnamed substance" layin around. Notice the plastic top too..

As the night progressed nothing changed on my end. I didn't feel like being in that room, and as much fun as it is to gain your cleric/ranger another level.. I would have rather done something more constructive. In the party, more have shown up and the drinking is much worse.

It now has come to be 3:30, friend Mr.A in the bathroom says "Shinkansen, hows ith going? I'ms really Drunk and should stop.. Why do i have a beer in my hand!!!???" I leave.

At about 5:30 in the morning, well after I have gone to bed, my room mate goes out side to shut people up from the party. It turns out that one of the kids, Mr.J, down the hall got a little "tipsy." This morning a sober kid at the party describes it as "Projectile vomiting that defies the laws of physics." This kid does know some physics...

    Question 1:
Why would it be fun to drink yourself to that position? I know alot of people who plan on vomiting certian nights. What the hell is so good about loosing all of your precious precious innards?!?! Also, isn't it painful if you are wretching that much?

    Question 2:
If this vomit really defies the laws of physics.. could it be harnessed in more useful ways? I mean having on floors and walls really doesn't help society that much. Think of the possibilities!

Needless to say, this kid is in some pretty bad shape. I feel kinda bad. Also, I am considering switching to some sort of theif or an invoker. Any suggestions?



Well... (none / 0) (#1)
by Yoshi on Sat Mar 23rd, 2002 at 09:53:32 AM PST
It sounds like a fun evening. I am, however, inclined to be skeptical of the defying of laws of physics in regards to the projectile vomit. Sure enough, even vomit is covered under nature's laws of projectile motion. You see, the horizontal component of velocity will always be zero, and thus, a projectile, such as vomit, will always come back down to the earth so long as its path is unobstructed. If you recorded the distance it traveled and the time it took, I believe you would find that this man's projectile vomit does indeed obey the laws of physics, thus, efforts to harness this science would be meritless.

Zero Acceleration (none / 0) (#6)
by Akumu on Sun Mar 24th, 2002 at 06:20:31 PM PST
Not velocity. If it was velocity, no matter how much hurking he did, the vomit would stay in his mouth.

Perhaps the vomit defied the laws of classical physics. Maybe it left his mouth at such a speed that teesubvomit changed at a rate much slower than teesubsoberkid. This would make it appear to break the laws of physics.


not quite (none / 0) (#9)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Mar 26th, 2002 at 05:32:18 AM PST
you neglect air resistance.

Also, special relativity is still classical physics.

Newtonian, then. (none / 0) (#11)
by Akumu on Tue Mar 26th, 2002 at 08:16:09 AM PST
Air resistance: even so, zero acceleration is more accurate than zero velocity.

Though think of the possibilities if it defied classical physics! Quantum-vomit tunneling! Super-conducting vomit!


This (none / 0) (#12)
by Shinkansen on Tue Mar 26th, 2002 at 08:58:20 AM PST
was one of my initial points. If we could make the vomit-anti-icbm-defense tower, we would be able to stop the woar on terrorism all together!

Because 30,000 burning nuns can't be wrong...

war... {nt} (none / 0) (#13)
by Shinkansen on Tue Mar 26th, 2002 at 08:59:43 AM PST

Because 30,000 burning nuns can't be wrong...

recipe for quantum vomit (4.00 / 1) (#14)
by fzr on Tue Mar 26th, 2002 at 11:07:40 AM PST
Place one sober college student (keep looking, you'll find one eventually) in a box, with a radioactive source linked up to a particle detector.

Arrange for the detector to trigger the intravenous injection of a large quantity of vodka to the student if it registers a hit.

Close the box, and marvel at the "quomit" which both exists and does not exist at the same time... oooooh!

Do not re-open it, as this will reduce the vomit (and student) to its unpleasant classical state.

The problem is our Puritan background. (none / 0) (#2)
by dmg on Sat Mar 23rd, 2002 at 12:05:40 PM PST
After all, its common in Europe for kids to drink wine at mealtimes from the age of about five years old. It seems that the 'forbidden fruit' aspect of alcohol leads to its abuse.

As a nation, we Americans are very bad at doing anything in moderation. Our burgers must be the biggest, our porn the most obscene, and indeed our relationship with alcohol must be the most abusive.

Ask anyone who has ever been to a UCSD keg party they will know what I am talking about.

Anyway kids, abusing alcohol is not big, and its not clever, so just take it easy. OK ?

time to give a Newtonian demonstration - of a bullet, its mass and its acceleration.
-- MC Hawking

american porn is crap (none / 0) (#10)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Mar 26th, 2002 at 05:36:54 AM PST
...just a bunch of plastic women calling each other "bitch".

Now the Germans, they know how to make porn.

Ah, those were the days. (none / 0) (#3)
by Anonymous Reader on Sat Mar 23rd, 2002 at 06:01:58 PM PST
When I was in college, one night my 7 roommates and a couple of their friends decided to try to drink 7 full cases of cheap beer and a couple bottles of Wild Turkey as quickly as possible. I was lucky enough to be shut up in my bedroom, writing a paper, and they were partying in the suite right outside my door for most of the night. They got so drunk that every one of them puked, repeatedly. They'd puke, drink more, and puke again. They puked out the window, they puked off the fire escape. Hell, they puked THROUGH the fire escape and ran down to see how many levels down it would trickle through the grating. The next morning the building services crew actually had to come out and hose down the plaza in front of the dorm and the fire stairs, which they luckily did before most of the student body was awake. One of our downstairs neighbors, whose windowsill was hit, never forgave us.

To this day I wonder WTF they were thinking. I got drunk plenty of times in college, but if I got to the point of puking I considered it a LOUSY way to end the evening. My roommates saw "booting" (the most frequently used term at that particular time and place) as a goal to strive for, and then blessed it as a relief when it came. And then drank some more.

I don't really have a point to make, but I just had to share that puke party story.

That's nothing... (none / 0) (#4)
by Bad English on Sun Mar 24th, 2002 at 01:09:42 PM PST
Just last night this student in the room next to me ran out of his room and puked all over our hallway. There were two garbage cans surrounding the vomit, but I believed my hallmate had missed them both. Entirely. So now, outside for all to see, is a vile mixture of bile, stomach acid, and last night's dinner, with a stench that resembles alcohol. And it's out there, growing stronger and staining our carpet with every passing minute.

So the moral of this story? If you're going to puke in a communal hallway, you damn well better fucking clean it up or some people might get pissed!

The real story (none / 0) (#5)
by Shinkansen on Sun Mar 24th, 2002 at 02:06:54 PM PST
I think the thing that i really want to know is:

What do i do with the cleric/ranger?

Because 30,000 burning nuns can't be wrong...

If you fancy doing an official study... (none / 0) (#7)
by budlite on Mon Mar 25th, 2002 at 09:45:34 AM PST
...come to the town of Leyland, Lancashire, England and wait around outside the Eagle and Child pub on Church Road. SHould be plenty of subjects to observe. Failing that, just walk round the corner and wait around by the Fox And Lion and the Roebuck.

There's a fine old Roman tradition. (none / 0) (#8)
by dmg on Mon Mar 25th, 2002 at 12:16:48 PM PST
called the vomitorium Apparently supermodel Kate Moss collects the ancient pottery used in such places.

More vomitorium links can be found here and here

time to give a Newtonian demonstration - of a bullet, its mass and its acceleration.
-- MC Hawking


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