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 Let's get this straight

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Feb 03, 2002
While living the carefree life of a bohemian university student many years ago, I discovered two wondrous truths. You may ignore these truths, or you may use them to build your own great fortune, it matters not to me. I am already rich, by the standards of bohemia at any rate.
Truth One: There are only two organs in the human body which regenerate: the liver and the skin. However if you are living a life of deprivation--such as that sort of life a bohemian university student might lead--and have been reduced to eating only bonemeal and drinking water from the tap, it becomes evident after a suitable interval that bonemeal is a miracle drug and will cause other organs and human body parts to regenerate. The proof of this is that my fingernails began to grow at a tremendously accelerated, almost visible rate after only three months on this simple diet. Hair too. I am certain that more research will show that bonemeal, if consumed in sufficient quantities will help lost digits to regenerate. Lose a finger? Eat bonemeal. The finger will grow back. Eye poked out by a careless younger brother running with scissors? Bonemeal will help grow that eye back. Don't take my word for it--try it.
Truth two: Warts may be cured using voodoo and common tools found in most kitchens. First curse the warts loudly and make them feel unwelcome. Then, hack at them with a bread knife or any sharp tool with a serrated edge. The wart will vanish leaving only a relatively small but bloody crater.
I am open to suggestion as to how to leave a blank line between paragraphs.

More diaries by Orinoco
After the Pub Closes
Lent is a time for Sacrifice and Reflection
Getting My Way
Feminist Slanders Exposed by Orinoco
Testicular deficiency at
My Mexican Vacation.
The Islamic Gene


Secret bohemian parapgraph voodoo. (none / 0) (#1)
by tkatchev on Sun Feb 3rd, 2002 at 07:39:14 AM PST
Use "


P.S. Did you know that "Bohemian" actually means "someone who lives in the Czech republic"? This is a weird corruption of languages because the meaning of the word "bohemian" actually traces back to the lifestyle of the gypsies. Somebody got confused and thought that "bohemian" refers to gypsies, and the label stuck. In reality, bohemians are completely unrelated to gypsies.

Peace and much love...

Crap I am a retard. (none / 0) (#2)
by tkatchev on Sun Feb 3rd, 2002 at 07:40:12 AM PST
I meant, use "<P>".

Peace and much love...

Gracias (none / 0) (#3)
by Orinoco on Sun Feb 3rd, 2002 at 07:47:45 AM PST
Thank you!

Thank you!

I thought... (none / 0) (#4)
by Greg on Sun Feb 3rd, 2002 at 11:22:03 AM PST
... your original comment was rather droll, in a low-key kind of way.
Sometimes it's hard to tell whether you guys are serious or not.

Sigh. (none / 0) (#5)
by tkatchev on Sun Feb 3rd, 2002 at 11:32:18 AM PST
I actually wanted to act friendly once in a while. Turns out I acted like an asshole, like always, and against my own will at that.

Peace and much love...

There there. (none / 0) (#6)
by Greg on Sun Feb 3rd, 2002 at 11:54:00 AM PST
It is not your fault that your good intentions were subverted by Scoop's innovative implementation of hypertextual transparency.

heartwarming (5.00 / 1) (#7)
by nathan on Sun Feb 3rd, 2002 at 11:55:32 AM PST
Turns out I acted like an asshole, like always, and against my own will at that.

A profound Christian truth.

Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

What's That Running Down? Your Leg? (none / 0) (#9)
by Orinoco on Mon Feb 4th, 2002 at 01:22:07 AM PST
I viewed your actions as friendly and not assaholic, for what it's worth.

Well, (none / 0) (#10)
by tkatchev on Mon Feb 4th, 2002 at 01:39:00 AM PST
If you view my original post in a sort of sarcastic, facetious perspective...

Peace and much love...

Voodoo. (none / 0) (#8)
by hauntedattics on Sun Feb 3rd, 2002 at 02:36:54 PM PST
Actually, Compound W(TM) and other wart removal elixirs work on the same principle as your voodoo method, except without all the blood and cursing. However, if you like the messy way, then who am I to judge?


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