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cute-teen-opalhawk is walking through the yard, carrying her school-books. teen-osm and six-year-old-osm are playing catch with a football. 6-year-old-osm misses the ball and it heads for cute-teen-opalhawk.
teen-osm: cute-teen-opalhawk, look out!
it is too late, the ball hits cute-teen-opalhawk in the head, knocking her hair loose, such that it flows elegantly down her back. she begins to weep and runs inside, the boys follow.
cute-teen-opalhawk: mom! mom! oh, this is awful!
spaceghoti-as-ghimp: what is it dear?
cute-teen-opalhawk: the football hit me on the side of the head. it knocked my hair loose so that it flows elegantly down my back! i am now even more beautiful! this is awful!
female-spaceghoti and male-spaceghoti enter the kitchen.
spaceghoti-as-ghimp: what is it, spaceghoti?
male-spaceghoti: we are tired of being the middle child! we are tired of having to play with ourself in the basement!
spaceghoti-as-ghimp: spaceghoti, i told you not to play with yourself! that is why you are in the basement in the first place! six-year-old-opalhawk, come in here!
six-year-old-opalhawk joins the others in the kitchen.
six-year-old-opalhawk: yes, mother?
spaceghoti-as-ghimp: now, you, six-year-old-osm, cute-teen-opalhawk and teen-osm have been very mean to spaceghoti. i want you and six-year-old-osm to go to your room until supper. the same goes for cute-teen-opalhawk and teen-osm.
six-year-old-opalhawk: oh, six-year-old-osm, finally we may explore each other in our childlike innocence! how my undeveloped breasts and unfattened buttocks have yearned for your boyish hand!
the six-year-olds hold hands as they skip off to their room.
cute-teen-opalhawk: teen-osm! we may finally consumate our teen curiosities! how my pouting teen breasts tingle under my bodice! how my rump quivers in anticipation!
teen-osm: by my open-source hand shall you take the next step to womanhood!
cute-teen-opalhawk & teen-osm: hooray!
teen-osm throws cute-teen-opalhawk over his shoulder and carries her to their room.
male & female spaceghoti turn to leave through the patio door.
spaceghoti-as-ghimp: where are you going spaceghoti?
male-spaceghoti: nobody appreciates us here. we are going to run away and gain feelings of acceptance by whining on adequacy.org.
hermaphrodite enters the front door, carrying a brief-case.
hermaphrodite: hi, honey! i'm home!
spaceghoti-as-ghimp: oh, hermaphrodite! let us retire to the bedroom and frolick like the playful imps we are! all day, i have been dreaming of commanding your love-wand into my throbbing rectum.
as spaceghoti-as-ghimp and hermaphrodite walk to the bedroom holding hands, spaceghoti's "wife" enters the kitchen. he removes several pans filled with meat from the oven.
spaceghoti's "wife": hey! doesn't anyone want a piece of this buffalo?! well, i guess i'll have to eat it myself. shoot, just when i was trying to lose some weight.
laugh track, applause.