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 Unpleasant realizations

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Jul 20, 2001

Satori sucks.

More diaries by hyacinth
So my boss is at a wedding in Michigan today. Discovering I had no work ethic, I slept in 2 hours and showed up late to continue my task of measuring pictures on a computer screen.

We're studying microgravity combustion, and the length of the gouts of flame gives us all sorts of useful information. This week I digitized and edited the films of the experimental trials and exported them to JPGs. Now I am sitting in front of a monitor, with a ruler, measuring pictures of fire.

It's not pleasant to discover that you can be replaced by a shell script.

A small one.



Have you considered... (5.00 / 1) (#1)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jul 20th, 2001 at 10:38:24 AM PST
...this course of action?
  • Choose an extremely feminine nick (such as the one you have!).
  • Get an 'IRC client'.
  • Find a network populated by g**ks.
  • Inform them that
    • You are female.
    • You are in need.
    • That only their 1337 shell script writing abilities can save the day!
  • Wait for half an hour before picking up your script.
  • Run the script, and spend your work-time in idle luxury, posting to and drinking cognac whilst your mechanical friend does all your work for you.
I think you will agree that this course has many advantages. What are you waiting for? :)

My username (5.00 / 1) (#2)
by hyacinth on Fri Jul 20th, 2001 at 11:46:18 AM PST
Hyacinth is the 2,829th most popular female first name in the United States. Which is weird, because it started out as a boy's name.

The Catholics have Saint Hyacinth, a Polish missionary whose life seemed excessively dull and pious. He didn't manage to get himself martyred, but apparently made the cut anyway. Everybody remember to party on his feast day, 17 August.

But before that came the pre-Hellenic vegetation god Hyakinthos, who bears a strong similarity to other dying and resurrected gods like Adonis, Mithra, and Christ. He eventually got co-opted into Greek mythology as the lover of Apollo, and accidentally got done in by same with a poorly-thrown discus. Grief-stricken, Apollo caused the hyacinth flower to grow from where the blood had fallen. (Apparently, getting involved with Greek gods resulted in being turned into a plant or tree or animal at least half the time.)

Anyway, I picked the name for other reasons.

--Hyacinth, font of useless information

P.S. What makes you think I'm not 1337? Or were you suggesting that I just trick others into doing my dirty work? If the latter, I salute you.

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.

Hmm (none / 0) (#3)
by sventhatcher on Fri Jul 20th, 2001 at 11:52:27 AM PST
It was my natural assumption that you picked the name in reference to the character of the same name in Stephenson's The Big U.

--Sven (now with bonus weblog vanity site! (MLP sold seperately))

Interesting (none / 0) (#5)
by Anonymous Reader on Fri Jul 20th, 2001 at 12:08:06 PM PST
2,829th? I would have thought it was more popular than that. It seems like a nice, homely white picket fence sort of name, perhaps someone's mother would be called Hyacinth, and would have big hips and a studious interest in flower pressing.

This is all complete prejudice of course, plus I'm British, I've heard that Americans tend to associate names differently (because in America 'Sherman McCoy' is more likely to be a black 'homie' than a tiresome Irish type, for example).

Still, its a good name and I like it, 'cos I'm a natural conservative who likes traditional names and the comforting homely images they bring to mind - jam and crumpets, tea with the Vicar, 103 not out for Jones of Darbyshire County as the crowd politely applauds and the people in the cheap seats barrack.

Anyway, enough rambling. I didn't make any assumptions about your being 1337 or not - if you are 1337, you could have written it yourself already and not made a diary about it, so therefore you'd be lazy (a wonderful quality). If not, then its all the same.

Or were you suggesting that I just trick others into doing my dirty work? If the latter, I salute you.

This is just the sort of behaviour that the discriminating people who read ought to have. I salute you :)


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