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Votes: 4

 Martin-Cortez Newsletter, Issue 1 v I

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Dec 16, 2001
Greetings Noble Sirs,

As you can see by my improved writing style, I have hired a new team of naked females to type for me. Rest assured, I have added a clause in their hiring contract specifically outlining the duties they will provide. I wish to thank you kind sirs for your patience.

I would like to take the time to tell those of you who are fleeing this controversial site like roaches running for cover--Good riddance, we did not want your unwashed, dirty hands to write so called "diaries" about your nasty, sinful lives. May you all rot in your lower class hellholes.


More diaries by Martino Cortez PhD
Good Morning Nobile Sirs
Dearest Adequacy Readors
Deor Adequecy Readers
Martin-Cortez Newsletter - Issue 2, Vol I
Martin Cortez Newsletter, Issue 3, Vol 1
Martin-Cortez Financial Newsletter Issue 4, Vol 1
Martin-Cortez Financial Newsletter Issue 5, Vol 1
Dear Anonymous Reader Sir,
Help Save Me!!!
Martin Cortez Newsletter, Issue 5, Vol 1.
Dr William King Sir,
Martin Cortez Newsletter
Good Evening Dear Sirs,
Sir, Wherefore art thou adequate?
Dearest Adequacy Readers,
Dear Sirs,
Mr. Milosovic Sir,
A plea from a busy corporate executive
Dear Sirs,

As your leader, I feel it is important to inform you of my day to day events. Below is what I plan to do this sunny, warm day.

  1. Bask nude on the beach
  2. Play a round of golf with Former President Bill Clinton
  3. Fly to New York on my private jet
  4. Dine with the editors - discuss how poor people should be employeed in more shoe washing positions.
  5. Be pleased by my nude typists
  6. Go to bed.

Good day noble sirs,

Dr. Martino Cortez, PhD
Martin-Cortez Financial Corporation.


do you let your nude typists...? (none / 0) (#1)
by loginadequacy on Sun Dec 16th, 2001 at 05:57:15 PM PST
ride ( and write) on your bare skin ?

If you get pleasure out of that, you are the very person i'm looking for to be this star in my new film "The Pillow Book II".

take good care of your skin, sir. I may have desire to purchase them for $1000/sq inch to make this film.

pillow book? (none / 0) (#2)
by nathan on Sun Dec 16th, 2001 at 06:00:08 PM PST
As in the famous one by Sei Shonagon? Or is the phrase just an idiom or genre?

Nathan, intrigued
Li'l Sis: Yo, that's a real grey area. Even by my lax standards.

The Pillow Book (3.00 / 2) (#3)
by loginadequacy on Sun Dec 16th, 2001 at 06:19:30 PM PST
Yes, indeed. Peter Greenaway made a film "The Pillow Book" (1996) based on Sei Shonagon's Makura no soshi

hehe (5.00 / 1) (#5)
by poltroon on Sun Dec 16th, 2001 at 06:22:55 PM PST
you beat me.

The Pillow Book (5.00 / 1) (#4)
by poltroon on Sun Dec 16th, 2001 at 06:20:50 PM PST
is also a film by Peter Greenaway which involves lots of writing of the poems you're thinking of all over people. And apparently there's a sequel in the pipe. Who woulda thought.

A sequel?!? (none / 0) (#6)
by zikzak on Sun Dec 16th, 2001 at 06:39:39 PM PST
Hopefully we will be spared from Ewan McGregor's penis this time.

Yes... (none / 0) (#7)
by Lint on Mon Dec 17th, 2001 at 03:26:32 AM PST
Especially as I recall that his character died at the end of the original. I think even that is beyond Greenaway's "style", if you know what I mean.

Your denial is beneath you, and thanks to the use of hallucinogenic drugs, I see through you. Bill Hicks

He died? (none / 0) (#9)
by hauntedattics on Mon Dec 17th, 2001 at 08:12:58 AM PST
What did he die of? Overexposure? Sexual exhaustion? Or just plain ink poisoning? I have no patience for Greenaway and don't plan to see the movie, so don't worry about spoiling it for me.

TPB spoiler... (none / 0) (#10)
by Lint on Mon Dec 17th, 2001 at 12:41:52 PM PST
He died of an overdose to get Nikimo's (Nikito? Nikita? I'm too lazy to look it up) attention after she spurned him for having sex with the fat, nasty Asian publisher. I suppose he wanted her to write on him one last time, or something.

After his death, the publisher has a real pillowbook made out of Jerome's skin (that's Greenaway for you).

I think it ends on a better note, but it's been a while since I've seen it. Unfortunately, I just can't remember it right now. ;)



Your denial is beneath you, and thanks to the use of hallucinogenic drugs, I see through you. Bill Hicks

Death? (none / 0) (#11)
by zikzak on Mon Dec 17th, 2001 at 12:50:02 PM PST
Since when has Greenaway allowed a little thing like death stop him from showing a man's penis?

HahahahaHA! (none / 0) (#12)
by Lint on Tue Dec 18th, 2001 at 02:33:54 AM PST
Ohhh, you're right, of course. Even a well-cooked penis is, as you pointed out, within his, er, grasp.

However, Ewan's penis was released in paperback form in The Pillow Book. Though I'm curious, in this hypothetical sequel, as to how it could be brought back... a book end? Paper weight? I'm sure the possibilities are endless. ;)

Speaking of Greenaway, I caught Prospero's Books on IFC tonight. An interesting adaptation. Between that and Gormenghast I believe I need to give my eyes a break... watching both was like a visual ten course meal, though Greenaway's stuff was higher in calories, I think.

Your denial is beneath you, and thanks to the use of hallucinogenic drugs, I see through you. Bill Hicks

a sequel indeed... (none / 0) (#8)
by loginadequacy on Mon Dec 17th, 2001 at 08:11:05 AM PST
Yes, the original Greenaway's Pillow Book is definitely an assault on the senses. What the movie has in visual abuse, it lacks in characters. So I decided that a sequel with adequacy characters, like our honorable Dr. Martino Cortez and his female nude typists is inevitable.


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