||Love cannot be based on sex, any more than love can be based on money, food, intelligence, or any number of other material goods. Love is love; you are supposed to love your mate in a similar way to the way you love your parents, your siblings, your friends. That is what "love" was supposed to be, in the original meaning of the word.
The industrial age, however, invented a strange homunculus: the concept of "sexual love". From now on, the love for you mate is supposed to be different from all other kinds of love, it is now supposed to be a strange sort of "love" that is based on sexual domination, intimidating sexual practices, and an ever-increasing sensuality.
Indeed, this new sort of "love" was "love" only in name; in reality, it is nothing but an obsessive-compulsive hypersexuality mixed with delusional, repressed sexual complexes. In the original sense, "love" was supposed to mean a deep feeling of kinship, a way to assert your individuality and a way to stay secure in a turbulent world, a way of overcoming difficulties together. This new "sexual love", however, was nothing of the sort; this "love", instead of bringing solace and guidance to lost souls, brought anguish and angst to impressionable, sexually unprepared young minds. This new sort of "love" convinced young men that to assert your individuality you need to assert your raw physical and sexual power, much like a stallion or a prize bull breeder. The young women, in turn, were convinced that the only way to get support and understanding in this world is to whore your body for it. An extremely degrading and anti-humanist world-view, the concept of "sexual love" created much of suffering we see in the modern world.
Why did the society at end of the industrial revolution suddenly need this new concept of "sexual love"? Simple: at the time, conservative, Christian-based victorian attitudes still held their ground in society, at least in name if not in spirit. At the same time, this was one of the darkest times for Christianity, with various anti-human philosophies at their peak -- a small example of the intellectual climate at the time: communism, socialism, nihilism, Nietzsche, nationalism, imperialism, and social-darwinism. In effect, the lip-service to victorian values, coupled with rampant liberalist philosophies, created an immense moral vacuum in Europe at the time. Just as an example: in the later 19th century, the number of prostitutes in Europe was at an all-time high! This number has been going down as time goes on. In fact, at the time, prostitution was seen as something casual and irreverant, a light act of entertainment.
In short, European society at the time needed a way to justify their immoral lifestyle and world-view. It found a perfect candidate: the mythical concept of "sexual love".
Peace and much love...