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What would you do?
Wives, houses, cars, etc. can all be replaced. 5%
Wives, houses, cars, etc. are more important than sex 15%
Stop a clock? What the hell does that mean? 26%
Go find her, she probably hates you. 10%
Learn some self control. 26%
Stop whining. 15%

Votes: 19

 This is Bad

 Author:  Topic:  Posted:
Oct 02, 2001
My brother-in-law held a party for his birthday last Saturday night so I thought I should at least get him a card in return for his graciously supplying me with decent beer. I stopped by the local Target store to get one, my wife needed a few things as well. While waiting for her to pick out a bottle of hair spray and amusing myself by looking at vaccuum cleaners or some such , my peripheral vision detected a person stop abruptly about 5 feet away from where I was standing.

More diaries by Hunter
I generally don't try to make friends with people at department stores so I didn't pay any attention to the fellow shopper, at least until she said 'Hello'. At that moment I looked up. 'Hi' was the best I could do. A person who I never expected to see again, certainly not in the middle of a gigantic Target store, was standing right there in front of me. She tried to say something else but I essentially ran in the other direction. I had done my best to forget about her, although the memories still return with alarming regularity despite the fact that I hadn't seen her in over three years.

She and I shared an off and on relationship for a little over a year. We didn't get along all that well, except in bed where she could stop a clock, but we did enjoy ourselves. During that period I became terribly attached but certainly didn't inform her of that. The extent of the attachment was actually recognized only after things had ended. Over the last couple of years I have made half hearted attempts to find her that always ended in futility. I was quite sure that she had left the state for some reason or another, now I know that she has not. Indeed, we used to live on opposite sides of the city but her presence at an otherwise non-descript department store leads me to believe that she is closer to me than before.

In the intervening years I have gotten married, changed jobs, bought a house, etc. My present life is relatively excellent and a reasonable person would have no desire to throw it all away over what is most likely a warped fantasy inspired by the quality of the sex alone. I am not yet convinced that I am a reasonable person. I know that I will try to find her, much more seriously than before. If I am successful there will be a monumental decision to be made and I am unsure of whether or not I will be able to follow what I know is best.


Whoo boy... (3.50 / 2) (#1)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Oct 2nd, 2001 at 09:35:47 AM PST
My sympathies are with you. No advice to give, except...I've been there, and it's hell. On everyone. Including you. Take care.

My friend the loser: (2.66 / 3) (#2)
by tkatchev on Tue Oct 2nd, 2001 at 10:06:01 AM PST
Methinks you have a bad case of semantic confusion. Sometimes I wish people like you would be put in a concentration camp for a few days, just so that you'd know what true hell is like. You demean the word by applying it to pointless domestic bickering nobody gives two shits for.

Peace and much love...

You fucking fascist (3.50 / 4) (#3)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Oct 2nd, 2001 at 10:16:09 AM PST
I wish people like you would be put in a concentration camp

Tell me this,fascist, do the jackboots give your feet blisters?

Loser take two. (1.66 / 3) (#4)
by tkatchev on Tue Oct 2nd, 2001 at 11:33:55 AM PST
Once again, the intellectual midgets among us do not fail to stumble over "tripwire" phrases. My friend, go back and read my comment again. Just because I used the words "concentration camp" does not mean I endorse fascism. It simply means I have a better grasp of history than you do. Truly sad that a historical fact has been refitted into a weapon for left-leaning liberal for idiots to bandy about.

Peace and much love...

Oops. (none / 0) (#5)
by tkatchev on Tue Oct 2nd, 2001 at 11:37:20 AM PST
Remove the second word "for" in the last sentence. Sorry.

Peace and much love...

i don't wanna hear it (2.00 / 1) (#6)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Oct 2nd, 2001 at 01:12:31 PM PST
Everything you say is a lie designed to further your sick plan to systematically extirpate those who fail in relationships.

oh yeah, and the fact that you replied to my obviously facetious post with a 'those of us who understand history will not kowtow to the PC liberal hysteria' type post in order to establish your intellectual credz shows your an easily manipulated dumb fuck....

Ouch... (none / 0) (#7)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Oct 2nd, 2001 at 01:28:28 PM PST
Maybe I should've been a little more specific, or used a modifier, like "personal hell" or "emotional hell." My point was that relationships are hard, and messy, and sometimes they hurt. A lot. Messy or hard personal relationships are not as bad as being in, say, a concentration camp, but I'd argue that they're an important influence on people's lives and actions. But to your point about semantics, I hereby correct my original post to say "I've been there, and it's really hard and messy, and it hurts a lot." Kak vyi dumaiti ob etom?

It's better now. (none / 0) (#9)
by tkatchev on Tue Oct 2nd, 2001 at 09:47:18 PM PST
"Hell" is simply too emotionally charged of a word. It sometimes sends a whole other message to people. (Especially if you are at all religious.) To some people "hell" is some sort of an abstract concept of suffering; to others, it is as much a reality as, say, Denver. (Picking a random city here, folks.) This is why saying something like "getting your toe amptutated is sheer hell" is not a good idea.

Peace and much love...

debate class (none / 0) (#8)
by THC 1138 on Tue Oct 2nd, 2001 at 02:44:07 PM PST
Everyone's an expert, be it history, relationships, liberal world domination; but no one seems to know how to carry on a proper argument. You know, little things, like not calling people names because you disagree with their viewpoint, or actually arguing (or just talking/writing about) the point of the main discussion instead of nitpicking at someone's grammar or choice of words.

Since this seems to be the prevalent method of disusion on (see the Linux story), for now on, every argument that I disagree with or don't like I am going to reply to with "That sounds like something Hitler would say."

How does it feel? Well it feels f**king blind. - b. k.

Preach on... (none / 0) (#10)
by Anonymous Reader on Tue Oct 2nd, 2001 at 09:52:46 PM PST
The arguments on this site are pretty pathetic.

I've been checking up on my posts and nobody seems to have made any rebuttals to any of the main points I've made. I guess since I take the time to preview my posts to rid them of grammar mistakes and such, no reader is given a chance to belittle my post becuase of a trivial typing error.

I also kept my posts (mostly) free of belittling insults and lofty historical/philosiphical references. Since all I'm making are valid points, none of the regulars here seem to have any real counter arguments.

It really seems all the "grown-ups" populating the membership of this site mostly revert to endless nitpicking and constant geek villification.

I've been waiting for all of you "middle class white male proffesionals" to "fight back". Being a black male computer enthusiast seems to put me right in the middle of your sights.

- chuckx - Charles K. Lee II -
- -
- -

I bow down to you. (none / 0) (#12)
by tkatchev on Wed Oct 3rd, 2001 at 04:45:07 AM PST
You are truly the argument god.

Peace and much love...

Please sir, get an account (none / 0) (#13)
by Adam Rightmann on Wed Oct 3rd, 2001 at 05:21:03 AM PST
For I have been burnt too many times responding to anonymous readers that were most likely fraudelent posts, presumable by mean Welsh editors.

A. Rightmann

Dude, at least get your spelling right first ! (none / 0) (#14)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Oct 3rd, 2001 at 06:26:43 AM PST
Adequacy is not a racist site in any way shape or form. We welcome contributions from ALL races, be they African-Americans, Europeans, Mexicans, Afghans, whatever. I state this quite categorically, WE DO NOT GIVE A FUCK WHAT "RACE" YOU CLAIM TO BE A MEMBER OF. And indeed, many of us here would argue that race is a social construct rather than a scientific reality.

What we don't like here is stupidity, the herd mentality, the 'four legs good two legs bad' rhetoric of the Linux imbeciles.

Finally, you seem to have made a glaring spelling error: proffesionals ???

My finger slipped, please crucify me. (none / 0) (#15)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Oct 3rd, 2001 at 10:59:13 AM PST
- chuckx -

Hitler? (none / 0) (#11)
by grey area on Wed Oct 3rd, 2001 at 01:35:54 AM PST
If you make such a claim you should be able to back it up, as Godwin's law is not recognised on Adequacy as a way to terminate an argument.

Furthermore, you misspelled the word "discussion" the second time you used it.

hope this helps!


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